Gather the Outcasts

This feels like a trap. Like some kind of joke. Hey, what would you tell your wife so that she doesn't suck? Typically this would be a land mine that I would desperately be avoiding. However, as Felicia and I talked about these blog posts I came to have better understanding of what they were about. It's not really about pointing out flaws in women but more about revealing how men think and see things. So, with the confidence that I'm not actually walking into a trap, here are my 3 things. 1. Don't Assume My dad always used to say, "You know what happens when you assume right? You make an ass out of u and me ." Not exactly Shakespeare but it got the point across. When you make assumptions you end up making both parties look ridiculous. Why? Because assumptions are something we make internally and never communicate. When we operate like this in life, particularly in marriage it makes everyone look foolish because we are almost never on the same page. It's ...

Alright, ladies! Let’s talk!  I first want to start out by acknowledging my place. I, by no means, write from a pedestal. I write from experience. Your girl here has messed it up a time or two, therefore, I feel comfortable talking about this topic not because I have it all together, but because I’ve had moments where I’ve really sucked at being a wife.  In last week’s blog, we broke down a few of the differences in men and women as a way to bring about some understanding between the sexes. To recap, we spoke on how women mostly perceive the world through an emotional lens and how men mostly perceive the world through a physical lens. While our perception of the world may be different, God absolutely intended for there to be a rich intimate companionship between the two. This week, we will focus on three topics that may help you and me with issues we face as wives; spirituality, speaking their language, and sex. Here we go… Spirituality . I always like starting with this one b...

Okay, so I am by no means an expert on men. I have no idea how their brain works, what motivates them, or why they just can’t seem to put the toilet seat down. I don’t understand why they throw their dirty clothes in front of the hamper instead of in it or why locating simple items throughout the house proves to be their biggest daily challenge….Wait, where was I? I had a point to all of this. Oh, that’s right, the blog. However, I do understand women. I understand how they think, what pushes them, and why most behave the way they do. God created man in His image, male and female He created them (Genesis 1:27). This means that God was masculine enough to make man, but feminine enough to create woman and He took great delight in creating us differently. So much delight, in fact, that in all of God’s creation, it was the only thing He described as “very good”. So it’s true, our brains and DNA are wired completely different and when we factor in other environmental, situational, and biolo...

Okay, I'm going to be talking about  how us men can do better as husbands. This isn't meant to be the "be all end all" of husband lists by any means but hopefully there are a few things you guys can take away from it. And, for any of you ladies who might take the time to read through this, perhaps it will give you an idea of how us guys think when it comes to relationships.  All that said, I do not claim to be a relationship expert. However, I am a man and a husband that has had to learn from many, many, many mistakes! I am going to be leaning into that experience as I write this list. I'm also going to do it a little different and make this a countdown to what I feel/believe is the most important thing we can do. That doesn't mean that the first four things on my list are unimportant, they for sure are, but there is one thing above all that I believe will help us guys not suck the most. Some of you may like this list and really appreciate it. That is great an...

  Family. We throw that word around a lot without giving much consideration to what we mean or what others hear. That one word can mean so many different things to so many different people. Our personal definitions of "family" are all influenced by our experiences of it growing up. What did we see and how did we feel within our own families? For many family could be defined as broken and dysfunctional. For others it could mean safe and secure. My definition of family has changed over the years as my experiences have caused me to rewrite the internal definition I had of family many times. One thing that has remained a constant in my definition is "family is what you make it". Some of you may not believe this. Your experience tells you that family is forever and constant. That only blood relatives are "family". That's okay. You can hold on to that. I understand where your coming from but for me family has been fluid and ever-changing.  When I was born it...